Divorce Cakes in Bracknell
A divorce cake is a cake with one good line on it. The line is free — writing is included in the price of every cake here — so what you are choosing is the size and the words. A 4" bento is £70 and feeds 4; a 6-inch from £100 cuts 8–12. Made to order in Bracknell, with 3–5 days’ notice for the small one.
Most of these are bought by a friend. If that is you, the second section is the one worth reading — the size follows from who is in the room.
What does a divorce cake cost?
| Item | Price |
|---|---|
4" bento cake One line, four forks — the commonest order on this page 4 portions | £70 |
6" cake For an evening with friends rather than a party 8–12 slices | £100 |
8" cake If it is a proper party with a proper guest list 14–18 slices | £130 |
6 cupcakes A message split across six, one word at a time 6 cakes | £45 |
Writing on top is included at any length. Bento prices are fixed; the larger sizes are floors, with any decoration agreed per order — see the price guide. Delivery from £30 by distance, or free collection in Bracknell.
Order a divorce cake
We reply within 24 hours with a price. No deposit is taken until you are happy with the quote.
Not ready to send it? What follows answers most of what people ask first.
How long it takes
7–10 days for a simple design, at least 14 for two tiers.
Sooner is sometimes possible: a rush adds 50% when the notice is under 7 days, if the diary is clear.
In a hurry? Bento cakes take 3–5 days.
Delivery
From £30, quoted by distance from RG12 0UY.
Collection from Bracknell is free — see the areas we cover.
Paying
50% deposit to hold your date; orders under £50 are paid in full.
Balance 3 hours before collection, or cash on the day.
The deposit is non-refundable but transferable with 4 days' notice — full terms.
Why is the writing the whole cake here?
Because nothing else on it is doing any work. A birthday cake can be a theme, a colour, a character; a divorce cake is a plain cake and a sentence, and the sentence is the reason anybody ordered it. That makes this the cheapest custom cake on the site to get right and the easiest to get wrong — writing costs nothing, so there is no price signal telling you that a line needing two sentences of context will fall flat on the table. The test is whether a stranger would understand it in four words.
What tends to work on one
A first name and a full stop. Nothing else.
A date — the one on the decree, in small writing on the side.
Four words at most, and none of them the other person’s name.
Or a message split one word to a cake across 6 cupcakes at £45, which lets the room read it in order.
Who is the cake actually for?
The person leaving, and the two or three people who have been listening to them for a year. That is why the 4" bento at £70 is the commonest order on this page rather than the 8-inch: the real occasion is a kitchen, a bottle and 4 forks. It goes wrong in one predictable way, which is a guest list containing somebody who is still sad about the marriage — a cake that is funny to the friends is not funny to a mother-in-law or a teenager. If you are not sure of the room, a plain cake with a first name on it works in every room there is.
What else gets ordered for a fresh start?
The same cake under a different name, most of the time. A new home, a new job, a last day, a decree — all of them are one small cake with one line, and all of them are ordered on 3–5 days’ notice by somebody who thought of it on a Tuesday. If what you want is the cake without the joke, the celebration cakes page is the plain version, and what to write on a cake is the one to read before you decide on the line. For the small format itself, bento cakes explains what fits on a 4" top.
What else do people ask?
Allergies? Our kitchen handles all 14 of the allergens UK law requires us to declare, so nothing we bake is free from any of them. What is in each cake, and our hygiene rating.